Rules for Thee, Not for Me
You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. Now we know that God’s judgment against those who do such things is based on truth. So when you, a mere human being, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God’s judgment? Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?
Romans 2:1-4
Rules for thee, not for me. Have you heard that clever rhyme before? It gets bandied about when people think those in authority make laws for others to follow but don’t follow those laws themselves.
We might take the accusations against the UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson, for example. Allegedly, during COVID lockdown in the UK, he and members of his staff held parties, even though no one was supposed to have large gatherings. If true, it would appear Mr. Johnson was practicing, “Rules for thee, not for me.”
The truth is we find this game easy to play, too. We condemn a sin. But when we find ourselves committing the same sin, we can somehow find all kinds of excuses to explain why it was okay for us to sin, when it is not okay for others. We have our reasons, and they are good reasons. No one else has a good reason to sin like that.
Take extramarital sex for example, that is, sex outside of God’s design for it to be a gift for man and woman in marriage. When others do it, it’s because they’re giving into their sinful desires. When you do it, it’s because you love each other and want to show that love even though you’re not married.
Or cohabitation, that is, living together as though husband and wife even though you’re not married. When God established marriage (Gen. 2), he intended that kind of companionship to be enjoyed by husband and wife, not by unmarried people. When others do it, it’s because they’re blatantly ignoring God’s command. When you do it, you can come up with all kinds of reasons. Because you want to test out the marriage before committing. Because it makes financial sense. Because in your perspective this is the best solution.
One more example. Holding grudges. When others hold grudges against people who’ve hurt them, it’s because they’re being petty or unloving. They just need to let go and forgive. But when you hold a grudge, it’s because that person deserves your wrath. They deserve to be punished.
There are two options then. Either accept that the sins of others may have valid excuses behind them. Or accept that there is no excuse for sin, either your sin or theirs, as God says through Paul.
You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things
Romans 2:1
Do Paul’s words sting? They should. God accepts no excuse for sin. There is no good reason to break God’s law. What guilt! What shame! For we hold ourselves up as moral paragons while condemning the actions of others, the same actions we ourselves do. “Rules for thee, not for me.” What hypocrisy!
We realize, then, the complexity, the mire, the muck of sin. There are many times when it feels like we have no choice but to fulfill our sinful desires and to make every excuse for it. We try to treat sin as a simple yes or no question, but the truth is sin still clings to us so deeply we often can’t even avoid it. “What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death?” (Romans 7:24).
Tune into Romans 2:4. “Or do you show contempt for the riches of his kindness, forbearance and patience, not realizing that God’s kindness is intended to lead you to repentance?” We often don’t see consequences for our sins immediately. Sometimes it takes many years. Sometimes there aren’t any consequences.
But we should not take that to mean that what we’re doing isn’t sinful. God has told us what he considers sin. Instead, understand the reason for God’s kindness, forbearance, and patience. He is kind, forbearing, and patience so that we may repent.
God wants us to repent of our sins. To give no excuse but to simply say, “I have offended the Holy God.” He wants us to turn away from our sins. He invites us to turn to him for forgiveness of our guilt, our shame, our hypocrisy. If there were no hope for forgiveness, there’d be no need for his patience. But for the sake of his Son Jesus Christ who died to cover our guilt, shame, and hypocrisy, he patiently waits for us to come to him to be cleansed. “Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!” (Romans 7:25).